Can I say it again?

I love my job. Get used to reading that - because I will say it about 500 times over the course of the next couple months.
Things are going well. Started rehearsals for 'Biloxi Blues' It's going to be an amazing show. The cast is great. I don't know why this is, but I like working on a show with a bunch of guys. They're just so easy and laid back. Although sometimes I want to bring a cattleprod in just to see if anyone would listen to me then. Probably not, but hey - that's them. Most of the time I just let them go, because, really, why not? As long as they get stuff done, I don't care how many stories they tell. Although I will say it is frustrating to even remotely try to get them on track. I've learned that with Zach, it is best to let him keep everyone on track, because when you try to do it for him, you just look like an asshole.
I love being in rehearsals - I always have. I love the see people work on roles and discover and play together. It is true that the final product is not nearly as fun as the journey. It is so fun with this group because most of them are just amazingly smart. This is something I will never stop being astonished by with Playhouse actors - they are so witty and intelligent, and their choices are so natural. Most of the time they just make it seem so easy. Oh, there is struggle to, but there's even something about their struggles. I don't know, I guess you would just have to see it to understand.
The only thing I am still uncomfortable with concerning my stage management at the PBP is my utter lack of interesting characteristics. I'm just bland when it comes to working with people. I do my job, and I do it fairly well, but its hard for me to become a member of the group with them. Its a personality issue, and as I have one that could be described as meek, quiet, and simple, I don't really contribute much. I'm not a "game girl" like others, and I want to be. I should work on that.
Working on a show has its ups and downs, and the one in between if my ability to critique and contribute to a show. Granted, most of the time, I can't, so I just write a review, or write it in a script and keep for hopeful future reference. It is hard to sit in rehearsals and see or hear something that just rubs you the wrong way. And you want to say something so bad, but you know it is not your place, in fact it is inappropriate. Its hard. This means I should be looking forward to Asst. Directing Dracula, right? You would think so. Instead, I just don't know. How can I do that? Especially without stepping on the director's toes ... and why the hell would professionals listen to me? Can you imagine someone like Joseph Papke listening to me about the need to change how he delivers a line? Ridiculous, isn't it? I've got to buck up before then, or I will be as useful to them as a fly on the wall.
Random things:
* Apparently, there is going to be a night, according to Adam, that everyone as a group will decide that it is okay for me to let loose and really not worry about being responsible. And I must say, the idea intrigues me. I have not been irresponsible often in my life, and I do have this incredible desire to throw caution to the wind and have a "good time" That being said, I am also very anxious about this night because I don't trust myself.
* Have you ever watched 2 actors, who are still on book, work on a scene where they are dancing? Its hilarious! They're holding on to each other with one hand while the other is occupied with an open script, and as they sway to the "music" they talk to their scripts. Its a picture you have to see. Two actors rehearsing a love scene not looking at each other.
* I need to find a kareoke song. I need to find my kareoke courage. Every Thursday there will be kareoke at the Legion, and I can;t just sit there all summer. I love singing, but I've just about convinced myself that I am not good at it. Especially next to these pros. However, I am determined, and I will sing at least once this summer.
I should get to sleep. I should get up & walk tomorrow, but that would mean I have about 3 and 1/2 hours of sleep :S Serves me right.
Hopefully soon, I will be able to watch and post on 'Pulp Fiction' so watch for it.